It is day one of your Mommy Happiness Challenge! I hope you have been thinking about what your challenge could look like for you. Before I had kids, I knew exactly the type of mother I was going to be. I thought I was prepared and would know how to parent. Well, then I had kids and that all went out the window. I often talk about how I was in survival mode and I believe that was okay, up until a certain point. I wanted my experience to change. I was struggling with being anxious, prioritizing, letting go of my expectation of what parenting actually was and the expectations of the roles that I had set up for myself. Since parenting was not what I thought it would be, I had to reevaluate what type of mother I wanted to be. But first I had to figure out who I was as a mother. Do you know what type of mother you want to be? I want to be a calm fully present mother. I knew I wanted to be fully present with my kids, meaning I wanted to not be distracted in my thoughts about other things (such as work, relationships, or annoying housework) when we were together and I wanted to be calm (and not become visibly frustrated) over behaviors. For these things to occur, I knew I needed to work on myself. To be present I began using my tools of mindfulness and meditation much more frequently. I changed my thinking as well. To be calmer, I began eating healthier and working out as it helped me deal with stress much better. Doing those things, allowed me to find other forms of self-care too such as writing, doing crafts, reading (even parenting books) and making more time for my relationship.
Ready for your first challenge?
First find a time when you can be alone in silence. Sit for a minute or two and just breathe. Let the stresses go and focus on your breath. Then for 1 minute write down all the things that you do that bring happiness and joy.
Here is my list:
Reading a positive quote
Connecting with nature
Going on a walk
Sitting in the sun and feeling the sunshine
Making my kids laugh
Cuddling with my husband
Laughing together as a family
Writing, even if just for a few minutes
Practicing a mindfulness skill
Connecting with a friend
To work on being happier, first you need to know what brings your happiness. Keep that list close. Those are some of the things to focus on over the next 31 days. I would love to see your list. Remember to use the hashtag #mommyselfcare and show your list. Also sign up for my newsletter if you want more information on self-care. If you missed what this challenge is all about check out this post and this post. I also have several ideas for self-care in 5 minutes to check out if you need some inspiration.
Please note that this information is for informational and educational purposes only. Please note that this article, blog or challenge does not replace mental health therapy. If you are in need of services, please find a local therapist.